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During a recent conversation with a newly married colleague, I casually asked when she planned to become a mother. Her response caught me off guard. Instead of answering my question, my colleague turned the question around and asked, “why did I decide to have children?”
I was stunned.
I paused.
I reflected.
I then realized that, to me, having children was simply the natural cycle of life. We study, we work, we get married, we have children, and we live happily ever after. But why is this the “natural cycle”? Was I just following my parents’ example and society’s expectations?
Singapore, like many developed nations, is grappling with a falling Total Fertility Rate (TFR). Year after year, our government introduces incentives like the baby bonuses, parental leave, and housing perks, all aimed at convincing young Singaporeans to have children. Yet, the numbers keep declining.
Even the opposition uses this as “proof” that we have an incompetent government citing financial burden, time poverty, housing shortage, workplace inflexibility and gender inequality as the cause.
But, as I have come to realize, the hard truth is that increasing our TFR is a lost cause. Not because of poor governance, but because societal values have…
